“Minds alike attracts” this is the common saying of those searching through spirituality or belonging to a spiritual group. In our search for others alike, we can find minds alike in support groups, churches, Websites, Forums, blogs and many online social Networks like Facebook, or My Space . Either online or in a building, we’ll find a group with people that think like us and if we can’t find it, we create our own group.
Through my experiences, I have seeing some of these groups starting small, others starting big and as soon as they start they encounter problems with members. Problems like lack of participation or battles among members with heighten Egos, that eventually culminate in disassemble or corruption of the entire group.
I believe the main reasons of why most spiritual groups don’t survive, its because of lack of structure among its members while in a group setting.
Don’t get me wrong, there are wonderful people behind these groups, who started these with great intentions like sharing, learning and support. However, without structure among its members, of who is who?, who do what? and who is in charge of what?----the group is dune to it’s end as soon as it started. Yes, you might say that the lack of commitment is a main problem, when not all the members are committed to the mission and guide lines of the group, but we also have to look at the energy vibration of all members; there is lows, highs and none.
“Spiritual groups”, should be structure by levels of vibrations, and skills. Believe me, even in the other side of the veil, everyone is divided by it’s own vibration, skills and even ranks, with a purpose to progress and grow in knowledge.
In order to grow as a group and be successful, you need to keep in mind what type of members you want to keep in the group.
Through my experiences with spiritual groups, I have found very knowledgeable members with great loving personalities. I have also found peculiar types of personalities with such outrage characteristics, capable to creates mega problems in the entire group. After you read these types, I am sure you will agree with me by saying that you have found or met some of those types as well.
Among the personality types of members --there is the following types: Schizoids, Schizotypal, Antisocial, Histrionic, Obsessive–Compulsive, Narcissists, Dependent, Avoidance,Gossipers, Paranoids, General Patton Type, Attention Getters, and Psychic Vampires. I will discuss only the last four due to their relevance and how to deal with them.
Paranoids Type= I mostly refer to these as “Sensitive on steroids” frighten of even… their own shadow. This could be the most dangerous type to a spiritual group, because in their fears, they can easily become Witch Hunters---You guess it!..Salem Days, are not over! They are suspicious of others regardless they are dead or alive and think that they are out to get them, even an innocent comment can become malevolent to them. These are negative individuals mostly on self-denial and mirror their fears and personality on others. This is the type that constantly looking for approval of others, like..do you like me? do you think I am doing the right thing? The are also constantly looking for others to give them psychic/medium readings because their fears, prevent them from sensing their higher self or spirit guides. The more you try to help them, the more they think that you have other agenda besides kindness. The worst to do with this type, is the removal from the group, because if you do---- you are contributing to their fears. Do you best to teach them to walk out of their fears, if after everything you have done fails, just ignore them. Eventually, they will leave the group and seek for other groups where they can find security by having other’s attention. Remember, “Fear” can be a lethal virus for any anyone’s consciousness.
General Patton Type= Yes, “The Heighten Egos” are here! These are the ones that arrived to a group flashing their labels, diplomas and certificates. They know more than you at all times, and in all levels of spirituality---God forbid that you question their knowledge, or your will be punish by their own concept of justice. They constantly use the “I” on everything they are, like “I only work with this and that, showing a pattern of specialty from much likely--- they don’t know anything about it. They tend to be paranoid and suspicious and seem to be peculiar by their need to be different or special. They can be stubborn with old beliefs, perceptions and speech patterns. They think that because they perceive things one way, it applies for everyone and everything; regardless that perception can change constantly. Their spiritual experiences can be real but their own interpretation can be exaggerated or obscure. This type can kill objectivity in a group. They also notorious by believing that they are haunted by demons or in constant physical attack. The best thing to do with this type is to ignore them and catch their focus by doing group activities in which everyone works as a team instead of an individual. After all, there is not a letter “I” in the words team or group.
Attention Getters Type = You have seen this kind in Seminars, they start quietly with questions, until finally they grab your microphone and continue the seminar without you, if you let them.. In religions groups, they are the ones that can slap you with the Bible, if you don’t agree with them. These are mostly “Borderline” individuals. When they don’t get the attention they seek, they can turn from sweet persons to bitter and resentful toward their caregivers. They can consume themselves with fear of abandonment, consequently turning impulsive and self-destructive. When they are angry with someone they tend to “rewrite history”, by talking negative about the other person. This type is very difficult to deal with in a group, because of their unpredictable moods. Attention Getters feel the need to be in control of those who care about them and feels that others can ever do enough for them. You can ignore them but do not take the attention they seek drastically, since it will be the worst you can do. Just ease out from their control and make your group to focus in other matters than this individual or their affairs.
“Psychic Vampires” types = Yeap, they are sucking up your lasting drops of Light Energy with just their presence. These are the most common members in a spiritual group, they can suck your energy consciously or unconsciously. Their connection with their own light energy seems broken or interrupted and they feel the need to take energy from others to maintain their health. They usually start with telling their lives story, seeking for your empathy. As light workers, we always make the same mistake when sensing these individuals. We immediately feel the need to make barriers and bubbles around us to protect ourselves from this type. Wrong! When you feel the need to protect yourself, you actually telling your subconscious that there is a danger and that alone can trigger FEAR. Vampires can feel your fear no matter how much you hide it and they will feed from it, regardless your boundaries. Consequently, leaving you weak, without light energy and totally drain.. wondering what have you done wrong with your own protection procedures. When you spot these type of individuals, cover yourself with love and compassion, these equal as garlic and Holy Water to a blood thirsty vampire. They can’t stand it! Explain to them what are they doing to you or the group ---teach them how to harvest their own energy. The ones doing it unconsciously, will listen to you and learn to control it, while the ones doing it on purpose or consciously…… will leave the group seeking for more victims.
I have belong to several online spiritual groups since 2007, finding real great friends among all the personality types I mentioned.
They come from all walks of life and from any part of the globe, you can find them not only in spiritual groups but in your daily life as well. Like others, I have done my own groups and accept invitations to their groups either as courtesy or interest connection. I have walked out from some groups either for lack of participation or for clashes with the personalities I just discussed in this blog. By all this, I am not saying “Don’t join Spiritual Groups”.. NO, not at all… I just telling you, to be aware that even in spiritual groups you will find the same people you encountering in your daily experiences outside the group. Learn how to deal with them, and after everything from your part fails, just walk out and continue seeking or make your own group. Making sure that what ever group you make, have more than good intentions. Be selective with your members and give them tasks as individuals, as well assign task as a group. As Spiritual people, we are here to serve others at all times without expecting anything, because our reward comes from Divine Source…..
Love you all.. Love and Light!
More information on Spiritual Groups:
Psychological Exercises for Insights and self-awareness groups by Psychology of Growth James Neill